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therapy

Standing up to Bullies

BullyingPrevention

Image is from MH West & Co., Inc.

Bullies are people who are cruel and intimidate those who are weaker. One may tend to think that bullies are only found in our junior years but you can also encounter them in your adulthood. You’re probably wondering how this is possible since it is very unlikely that someone grown up will be bullied. In the contemporary society, there are so many cyber bullies and also workmates who would find pleasure in mocking you for anything you do. So, if by chance someone is belittling you, making you upset and depressed you should take some action. Here are ways you can deal with such people;

Stand up for yourself.

Bullies like using insulting words when confronting their victims. If you meet one look them straight in the eye and hold their gaze. Don’t back down at all even if they will probably be taller than you. Tell them firmly that you want them to stop bullying you at that very moment.

Gather some evidence.

You can do this by:

  • Recording words your bully is using, where it took place, and the time it happened.
  • Taking pictures of any bruising if they hurt you physically and don’t get rid of the clothes they ruined.
  • If cyberbullied, take screenshots and make copies.

Take the evidence you have gathered to the relevant authorities so that they can discipline the bully.

Go for therapy.

Growing up most parents always taught us to be strong and some parents will even tell you that therapy is for the weak. However, if you have been bullied, it is advisable that you undergo counseling. Bullying in most cases messes up with people’s emotions, and that can lead to depression. Seeking a therapist will help you heal psychologically. In some cases where victims don’t seek help, they result to committing suicide. This affects their friends and families as they are left wishing they could have done more for the victim.

Deal with aggression in an assertive manner.

This might seem like a stupid idea since this person is bullying you. Most books indicate that bullies victimize others due to insecurities and mainly jealousy towards the victim’s wonderful personality. A bully always thinks that making you feel bad about yourself will be a boost to their ego. The best way to deal with such aggressive people is by confronting in a neutral place such as a church, park or a coffee shop. In such an environment the bully will not try anything as there will be many by-standers. Calmly ask them why they are always picking on you. Don’t let your emotions take over as you may not get answers when you start screaming at the person who constantly hurts you.

Forgive your bully.

Forgiveness most likely seems impossible but it might be the right thing to do. Although bullies may have made your life a living hell, you don’t necessarily have to do the same thing to retaliate. Rather than keeping grudges, you will be more at peace when you forgive your bullies. It takes a lot of courage to do this, but deep in your heart you always find that it is the right thing to do. No matter what words they have used against you, or any physical pain they’ve induced in you, the best thing to do is to let go. That way you will be able to form better relationships with everyone around you.

 

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